Top Heartbreaking Manga/Anime Deaths

Mini Life Update

I've been MIA for 3 months!! Apologies for anyone that actually reads this blog of mine, I just got really busy with uni. As proof of that, I got two Ds and two Cs LOL, not that they're great results but definitely better than what I thought. Anywho, since I've been busy and haven't actually been reading any new manga (it took a while for me to catch up on all the manga I didn't read since I was focusing on uni lol), I thought I'd do a little list~

Top Heartbreaking Manga/Anime Deaths

I'd say my top 5 are the ones that every time I think about them, my heart breaks and I'd literally cry every time I think about them (no kidding). Every time I think about their deaths, the tears just come and my heart just hurts. The rest aren't as emotional for me but I do think about how saddening or maddening their deaths were and how much of a lost it was for them to be gone. 

I really wanted to do a just manga one but I realised that there aren't THAT many deaths that affected me so I had to include anime too lolol. I didn't include any of those tragedy kinda anime/manga btw because their genre and main stream of story kinda revolves around the emotional ties that they have so I wanted to include deaths that are either more unexpected or just not part of the main course of things I guess, if you know what I mean lol~

Needless to say, THERE ARE MAJOR SPOILERS so be prepared. I'll also most likely mention other deaths in the same manga/anime that broke my heart too so yay~ lol.

1. Honjo Ren (NANA)

(By JacquelineDickinson)

To this day, the thought of Ren's death brings me to tears. But the reason for the heartbreak is not only because I really liked Ren himself, but the repercussions of his death were so severely devastating that it just wasn't possible for anyone to truly have a happy ending anymore. Every time I think about how Yasu tried to break the news to Nana but he says that he doesn't know what words could possibly save her from the pain that was to come, I start bawling. It really makes you think, at what point did things go wrong? At what point did it have to lead to this outcome? When Ren left and joined Trapnest? When Ren and Nana reunited? Why did everything have to happen this way? Ren and Nana's relationship was so strained because of their respective goals and past actions but they still loved each other as much as they were possessive of each other. They just couldn't find a way to hold on to each other properly anymore.

The way Ren died was so...saddening. I don't think it's easy to pinpoint it as particularly one person's fault though because in the end, even if the reporters weren't there, he would have still went to see Reira, he would have still chased after that cat he saw as Nana and in the end if he wasn't taking drugs, Reira wouldn't have needed to do what she did anyway. It was an unfortunate accident that took place because of all the things that happened and ultimately changed everyone's lives. What's most heartbreaking for Ren's death is the destruction and change to the lives of everyone else, the guilt that Reira and Nana will forever have to bear over his death and not being able to see Ren happy. Ren was silly but also deeply broken as Nana was and I really wanted them to be able to be what they needed for each other, I really wanted to see them happy together again. Their relationship wasn't the most healthy but it was undeniable that they couldn't live without one another.

The manga remains on hiatus even though the author has stated that she will return to finish it but that date is still TBA, hence I am hopeful but also complacent. It's been on hiatus for many years after all, I mean even I'm older than the main characters now lol. But really, every time I read NANA again, I hate having to see Ren's death again, I still find it so unbearable to witness again and again even though I love the manga so much. There's no such thing as enough tears shed when it comes to this.

2. Portgas D. Ace (One Piece)

I still remember vividly the day I read the chapter Ace died in. It wasn't any better when it seemed like Luffy's efforts were fruitful and then it all just went downhill. But the moment the vivre card disappeared made me cry a river. Any hope was diminished the moment it disappeared. I literally could not stop crying that day. 

 Ace has always been a favourite character of mine because of how caring he was to Luffy and the good relationship they had as well as being a bit quirky but cool. I really liked the big brother that he was, he was always a character I looked forward to seeing and so when he got captured, when everyone went to rescue him, when Whitebeard died, I got really desperate hoping he'd survive, so it was really devastating to see it all end like that. It felt even worse to see Sabo feel extremely guilty for not having been able to come to Ace's aid as well. I have a soft spot for big brother type characters T_T

What's most heartbreaking over his death is the fact that Ace had a really bright future, he was capable, young and I wanted to see him and Luffy together for so much longer. I wanted to see his potential as Gol D. Roger's son and to continue taking care of Luffy in his own way. His personality was one I had become really fond of and am most nostalgic of.

On another note, when Going Merry went down, that was really saddening too T_T it was such a hardworking boat and it even wanted to keep on going on journeys together with them, it was so terrible to have to see it go, it was such a precious part of the crew.

3. Sagara Souzo & Oniwabanshu (Rurouni Kenshin)

Many might not even remember Captain Sagara but when I first watched Rurouni Kenshin, the soundtrack that played, his appearance, his existence and his dream for the future really shook me. Enough that over the years, I had forgotten many things about Kenshin but his death and the members of the Oniwabanshu were ones I may have forgotten the events of, but never forgot the feelings of. Needless to say I bawled when I watched those scenes again.

Rurouni Kenshin probably set my standard of bishounen back in the day as a kid because really, Aoshi and them are all so cool but I guess Sagara Souzo really took my heart as a kid lolol. Honestly, I was so sad that he had to be killed in such a way. He was the one that brought the other people together to fight for the new government and so it makes it even worse that he kinda brought them to their deaths. I guess the worst thing was being used as scapegoats by the government for them to go back on their words and then being known as liars to the people and scorned by them. When really, the Sekihoutai and Sagara were people who dreamed of an era of peace, they worked so hard for it believing in the new era and a better world but they were instead betrayed by those creating this new era. How could Sanosuke really believe in the future that these people were going to create? It was heartless and disgusting and I guess that was the kind of insight their deaths brought about for the story, the fact that the era was still beginning and that even though they were trying to bring about peace, there were still things that remained unchanged and corrupted that Kenshin had to help out with. The turmoil and bloodshed that comes with the changing of eras was quite piercing to the heart.

As for the Oniwabanshu, the way they died really made me cry my heart out as well, because you could understand how important Aoshi was to them and with what kind of feelings they sacrificed themselves for. I guess what touched me as a kid and as an adult now was that Aoshi did everything for his comrades that couldn't survive in the new era because they weren't needed anymore. Their set of skills, their forms of work and their frightening appearances were ones difficult to find ways to fend for themselves and so Aoshi wanted to at least prove that they were the best regardless of their current loss of livelihood. What caused a lot of anger as well was that they were unfairly killed by a gatling gun and that they in the end had to rely on their enemy (Kenshin) to save Aoshi but I guess that was most difficult for Aoshi to swallow. It was really hard to see Aoshi have to bear all their deaths especially when he was also the one responsible for them as a leader and the one that took them on to this path of life.

4. Kite (Hunter x Hunter)

"Not Meruem?! Blasphemy!" Is what others might say and I'll admit that Meruem's death was quite saddening though when I watched the 2011 anime. I don't remember enough about it in the manga because I wasn't a fan of the Chimera Ant arc  lolol, I'll have to read it again. Oh and I know technically Kite isn't dead but really, his appearance was something that I really liked so him being a little girl will just never be the same, sigh...

Anyway, I've always had special feelings towards Kite as the first character to appear in the manga and because of the words he said to Gon at their first meeting shouting at him that he had to kill that bear because of Gon's ignorance. It was also because he looked cool and unique hahaha. But for me, I guess it's also because I got attached to the mystery that surrounds Kite as well, it felt like another checkpoint kinda thing to Gon reaching his dad since he was Ging's disciple, so like Gon, there was this respect alongside the idea of him being a sort of goal too. I mean considering how they depicted Ging's personality before you get to meet him, it was always this sort of eccentricity that made you curious about how special Kite was to be able to become his disciple. In addition to the care, thought and patience he had with Gon and Killua in teaching them things. So for me, it was always really depressing that the more we got to discover about him, the closer it led to his death. I was quite heartbroken when I saw his head T_T

 I know that some people think it was dramatic for Gon to act the way he did for Kite but I think that translated better in the manga especially since Kite was only really introduced in the Chimera Ant arc in the 2011 anime, which made me quite angry since Gon always felt this respect for Kite and always regarded him as a sort of goal as well and so you could see how important of a figure Kite played better in the manga. So it never felt unnatural to me, especially when I loved Kite as much as him.

Another death I was really heartbroken about was Gotoh. He's one of the few that are extremely caring and loving (in a normal way) towards Killua and so I was really sad when Hisoka killed him. What's even more sad is that this fact is probably hidden from Killua considering the effect it would have on him... But I was always attached to him in a way because of the arc when they go to save Killua from his home. He was a fair person that was genuinely concerned for Killua but he also understood him and I really liked that about him.

As for the Spiders, I have to admit that Pakunoda's death always hurts me quite a bit because of her faith and love for the Spiders that she had. Her loyalty and strong emotions towards Chrollo and the original members was one that I couldn't help but love about her and understand. Her ability was also extremely unique. Talking about the Spiders though, the loss of  Kortopi and Shalnark was quite shocking and terrible considering how unique their abilities were as well, sigh. I actually liked Shalnark quite a bit too...T_T

5. Euphemia Li Brittania (Code Geass)

Euphemia's death was utterly heartbreaking, mostly because of how it happened and because she was such a kind and wonderful person that it was terrible for her to have to be remembered in such a way. It was hard to not like Euphemia seeing the way she carried herself and treated everyone around her and clearly, from the fact she was so loved by so many and how her death affected so many of the characters, you could see how important she was to our main characters and for a good reason too. I guess for me, I was devastated that considering how kind she was and how determined she was to change things. it was saddening to have to see her last actions be a complete contradiction of the person she was and for Lelouch to have to carry the burden of accidentally killing her and even having to tarnish her reputation. I didn't expect it and would really wish that didn't have to occur T_T

Another death I was really sad to see was Shirley's, she was so innocent and all she wanted to do was support Lelouch. I really really liked her because she was really cute and kind as well. It didn't hurt me as much as Euphemia's death did but it was still quite sad.

6. Nicol Amalfi & Tolle Koenig (Gundam Seed) 

Nicol was a young boy that had aspirations and dreams aside from being a pilot and so it was really difficult to see all of that crushed when he was killed. He was such a gentle guy that always helped and supported Athrun whilst having his own views of desiring to protect his homeland and his family, he was quite the model kind child. It was also difficult to have to face Tolle getting killed as well because Tolle just wanted to be helpful to everyone. In terms of the repercussions of their deaths though, although Nicol's death is what prompted Athrun to finally lose control and "kill" Kira, I think Tolle's death was quite confronting as well, especially when Miriallia wanted to kill Dearka for his ignorant comments, it was really hard to see her like that. So really, both of their deaths were quite a turning point for both Kira and Athrun and so it has always been saddening to think of their futures destroyed like that. It was then that they finally realised that they were being really naive about their actions and the biggest representation of how their hesitance has caused people to die.

7. Uchiha Itachi (Naruto)

Even before Itachi's past was revealed, I've always believed and thought that Itachi really loved Sasuke and so when his past was revealed and you could see that he loved Sasuke even more than you initially thought, it was quite heartbreaking. Especially when he had to bear the responsibility and burden of the deaths of his clan and the hatred of his beloved brother when all he really wanted was to protect Sasuke and Konoha. The guilt he had to bear, the scorn he had to take and how his life had changed into one of a criminal's was one that really made me tear considering he was already a favourite character of mine before this. I think I've got a soft spot for big brother characters to be honest.

8. Kanou Shou (History's Strongest Disciple Kenichi)

I'm really sad that the anime for Kenichi has never received any more seasons because I really think Kenichi is a pretty solid manga despite the fanservice, I actually really enjoyed it. Shou was always a really strong and cool character that really cared for Miu. He and Kenichi had this relationship of rivalry in terms of love and martial prowess and he was quite a formidable guy to be compared with and to fight against. Honestly, I was quite attached to his character and love for Miu that when he died, I was really sad. He definitely doesn't regret it but I always find it so disheartening when someone of his martial caliber was killed by something like a gun. Everyone's been training so hard to achieve their respective goals to spread the greatness of their individualistic arts and their deaths get tainted by things like guns, it's just so terrible.

9. L (Death Note)

I really do like L for his quirkiness and his relationship with Light. He always worked at a sort of disadvantage since Light was aware of him being L and worked closely with him so I always admired L for being so capable and smart whilst also feeling a bit attached to Light himself as a sort of friend. They were enemies but also comrades and it was always enjoyable to see their exchanges with each other whether it be with their wits or their casual conversations.

I have to admit though, the way Light won and killed L was really smart (for me anyway lol) and definitely a magnificent way to end their battle. I wasn't a fan of the way of everything that happened after L died though because it seemed more like Light lost because he became complacent and more prone to idiotic mistakes that just wasn't him and I guess that's what can happen when you don't have a considerable foe over the years but that wasn't the type of manga I signed up for or was into lol. I didn't feel any heartbreak towards Light's death though because I just thought it was quite degrading and embarrassing of Light's character to have turned into someone like that to plead to Ryuk to help him. I loved it when Ryuk reiterated that he was only like a bystander overseeing what he would do but would never interfere. It's definitely a contrast to Rem and the other shinigami that were willing to sacrifice themselves and break the rules to save Misa. But yeah, I really enjoyed L's interesting and cool character and was really sad to see him gone but I couldn't help but acknowledge the author's skills in bringing it to such a great climax. I've never watch the anime btw hahaha~ only read the manga XD since it seems that the ending for Light was kinda different apparently?

10. Fujiwara no Sai (Hikaru no Go)

Initially, I watched the anime and loved Sai because of how cute he was always asking Hikaru to let him play Go. Eventually, I read the manga and realised how heartbreaking and how different it was of a manga without Sai there. Sai has always been beside Hikaru teaching him about Go, training him and also providing entertainment with his desire and love to continue playing Go even after death. When he played online and when he played games against Touya and his dad, they were such cool and iconic moments! I loved how Sai was both funny, adorable but also seriously cool, he really made Hikaru no Go unique. Therefore, although I understood the author's reasons for Sai disappearing (not really death since he's already dead I guess lmao), he was also everything that made the manga different from other shounen manga and so when he disappeared, it was still interesting but in a normal shounen manga way if that makes sense lol. It also made the whole manga more serious and lacking since there was no more comedy and fun that Sai brought so it was really saddening.

Sai's disappearance was also extremely heartbreaking because he didn't want to disappear either. He knew his time was coming but he wanted to keep on playing, he thought it was unfair as well and that just made it all the worse that he had to disappear like that with Hikaru calling him selfish as well. I mean, I know Hikaru's a kid but sometimes the way he treated Sai really infuriated me and made me sad because Sai put all his heart in teaching and training him but sometimes he just wasn't that grateful for it and was quite selfish and he called Sai selfish! I mean Sai may be unreasonable sometimes but it was really mean of Hikaru to say that! So yeah, I was pretty devastated that Sai had to disappear with regrets that he couldn't keep playing Go, couldn't keep watching over Hikaru and lamented over the fact that Hikaru was the one chosen to be the one that would be closest to or achieve the Hand of God I guess and that he wasn't. It was really hard to see him like that.

Other Honorable Mentions~

11.  Nuriko (Fushigi Yuugi)

As a young girl, Fushigi Yuugi was probably one of my most prominent exposures to shoujo. Initially, it's hard to like Nuriko (for me) because I thought he was annoying lol since he was always mean to Miaka but as you slowly get to know him, you realise how sincere and kind of a person he is. But I guess what hurt the most was when he realised his feelings for Miaka and became one of the first important characters that you get attached to and die. Honestly, I really didn't expect that any of them would really die until Nuriko did and once he did, many of the others did as well and it just broke my heart. Nuriko was always very smiley, optimistic and fighting with Miaka but he was really gentle and strong, oh and I guess persistent hahaha, he was a character you couldn't help but come to like and so it was saddening that he wasn't there to be beside Miaka through the rest of the journey when he really wanted to...

12. Miyazono Kaori (Shigatsu wa Kimi no Uso/Your Lie in April)

I know I said I wouldn't include those tragedy kinda emotional anime lol but I really liked how important of a role Kaori played in Kousei's life and how she wrote that letter, because that letter really made me cry. It was obvious what her lie was from quite early on in the story because as a person who delved in music and considering her parent's reactions, there was no way she didn't know who Kousei was, so the only reason she would lie was because she wanted to get close to him without giving him the burden of someone in the same kinda industry who expects something from him. Honestly, I really like Tsubaki as well because as someone who understands that there are some burdens you can never share as a person who doesn't know anything about music, I can feel how difficult it must have been to have to watch over Kousei without being able to do anything even though you knew he loved the world of music and was unable to let go of it.

So really, Kaori was really a shining star at night that was able to bring colour into his world again. It was just saddening that her love was reciprocated but she wasn't able to spend any real time of romance with him but I guess playing a duet with Kousei, talking to him and spending time with him was what she always wanted to do ever since she was a child so at least her dream did kinda come true and I guess at least she was able to at least do that...but it was saddening that he never really knew that she loved him all along until she died...

13. Maes Hughes (Full Metal Alchemist)

Hughes was always that super happy character that treated the Elric brothers with such care and hospitality that it was hard to dislike him. I mean, every time he talks about his little girl and his wife, he's just so happy and loving that you can't help but want someone like him as a husband. His love and appreciation for his family is above everything and he is also very serious about his work, which in turn led to his death. All because he was a step ahead of others in discovering things he shouldn't have that the Homunculus found out and killed him. Honestly, having to see him die the way he did was so hard because he was such a bright shining ray of light in the anime that it was so saddening to see him disappear. I missed him quite a bit T_T

Nina is also a tragic example of how alchemy can be used and how troubling it is to see a child so supportive of her father and yet was used as experiment material. The worst was most definitely when you realised that the dog was Nina and that she still sort of retained a part of her that wanted to play with Edward because that was downright depressing that you had to see a kid end up like that for believing in her father.

I saw other lists including Clannad but really, I played the game and Nagisa and Ushio are alive and well for me lolol so it doesn't really count hahaha~ Also, although I liked Clannad (anime), I wasn't a fan of the Clannad After Story (anime) as much. However, in terms of the visual novel, I really enjoyed the different routes and the After Story route with Ushio, I think the novel portrayed it much better and so much more beautifully that honestly, there's no reason to not play the novel if you loved the anime because it's that good. The other routes were really good as well with the other girls, the only ones I weren't really fond of was Kyou's and Ryou's tbh but I really like Kyou as a character so hnggg. Otherwise, Kotomi is still my favourite girl, Fuuko makes me cryy and laugh, Sunohara's was actually really sad but good, Kappei's was a sad but it was a good bromance, Yukine's was so peaceful and nice, Misae's was so heartwarming and Tomoyo's was kinda nice and funny lolol. Anywho, it's a great visual novel, totally worth your time and tears.

And that's it!~ That was a long post lolol, I tried to shorten it but I guess here and there I just couldn't stop blabbing about things hahahaa. I mean, they are heartbreaking so it requires many words T__T